“Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.”
— Frederick Buechner
Listen to your life.
The ability to listen, to pause, and to reflect on our own lives is a learned skill. Some people, like the great writers, possess a partly innate ability to step back and see the hidden beauty and mystery in the mundane, but this ability can be developed, and it is for everyone.
These moments of reflection can sometimes feel like out-of-body experiences where, instead of simply acting or reacting, we step off the dance floor and become wallflowers, observing our own life with a curious and non-judgmental spirit. We might say things like…
- “I got really emotional and hurt when he said that. Interesting, I didn’t realize I cared about this issue so much.”
- “Wow, I completely lost track of time working on this project and forgot to eat lunch. What was it about the project that engaged me so much?”
- “That time together was so life-giving. I’m thankful. I’m going to text my friends to let them know that.”
- “Why does homemade soup and bread taste so much better when the weather begins to turn? I’m looking forward to soups, breads, and our fireplace this winter season.”
These reflections and questions draw us into the present, clarify our thoughts, and lead us to a posture of thankfulness.
Helping Students to Listen To Their Lives
How do we develop this skill in our children and our students? This might look like dinner conversations, well-timed questions, a discussion about a movie we just watched, journal prompts, or demonstrating this skill and allowing our children to hear us process a few thoughts out loud. This may look different for each student, but it is important that it happens BEFORE they are seniors and we begin to ask them about their future career.
Undecided students who have never “listened to their own life” are left with no toolbox when faced with questions of college, career, and calling. We, as parents and educators, provide an invaluable gift to our students when we encourage and demonstrate this skill.
Questions
- How can you listen to your life today?
- How can you help your children or students listen to their lives today?
